Posts Tagged ‘draft’

Advice for Haitian Boys

February 22nd, 2010

Advice for Haitian Boys
“Something like 40 to 50 percent of the population at Port-au-Prince is kids.”

Girls’ skirts will open for nothing, for a song
just loud and long enough to minus out
the scratch of zipper teeth and second thoughts.
Don’t bother with names. By morning, you should be gone.

When brothers die, drink more rum than you can afford.
Cry, if you need. Piss circles around the bodies
and brawl anyone who abuses your right to grieve.
There are no excuses to outsurvive the adored.

Sometimes loss comes vaster. Whole cities fall,
bloodlines sever. There will always be some stranger
to shoo away the dust and flood paint thinner
on the stains. You won’t have to do a thing at all.

O that a man’s reach should not exceed his grasp.
Don’t plan ahead, don’t think it through. Don’t ask.

Gumji

February 18th, 2010

Gumji

I never spoke Cantonese.
I knew the words for rice,
bath, homework, hurry, go, late;
for give, thanks, big and little brother;
for masturbation and porn and salt
(they’re all the same)
but I only mapped the shapes of their sounds.
I couldn’t produce them with my New Yorker tongue.
Damn, dad must have been the same
except reversed. Somehow, our babble worked.

But then, in parts, we grew apart.
I pretended to forget our code.
We didn’t talk, didn’t leave notes,
walked the same hallways in silence,
and soon, with college abroad,
I forgot his language whole hog.

These days, he’s lost it all.
We watch the news the 2 Saturdays
a month I visit. There are only bombs,
new strains of flu, angry parents
complaining about the sorry state of our schools.
He asks for the … …
I can see his hand form the mold,
his thumb jab at his palm for imaginary buttons.
“Remote?” I ask but really tell.
I wish I remember Cantonese
so I could say “gumji”;
that instead of giving him what he can’t find,
I could restore what once was there
but now is gone.

My Calling rewrite

November 16th, 2009

My Calling

“you lie,” he cried
and ran on.
–Stephen Crane

It’s the knowing that kills me.
Not the knowledge of distant things
that is too slowly unhidden.
Journey
is unavoidable
in lives like these.

We count the nights
like pomegranate seeds.
I can tell by the weight
too many are missing.
I won’t survive
even as an inkling.

What else then
but crane my neck
toward the sky?

Theotokos

September 14th, 2009

Theotokos

Mother, the ring and wrinkles in
her voice are prima facie.
All else after,
symphony or stammer,
is written to her clef.
She quotes scripture
and we bind them to our hearts
simply because she is the giver,
like a habit for mathematics
or of pouring milk before cereal.
She is gravity, self-evident,
without need for rhetoric
to command her honor.

The immaculate heart of
Mary, mother of god,
is shown in a spotlight of halo
though always grotesque,
gashed and bleeding
and of the body.
The names of apostles
have abandoned their mysticism
and are instead tributes to grandfathers
and uncles. All roads
lead back to somebody.
The belly, its unwashed hunger,
is a terraformer, an artisan atomic.
Its product is a machined god
based in body and blood.

Even the body is a tyrant.
A muscle the size of a fist
beats out promissory notes.
Some never figure out
the breath or idea
to jockey its tempo.
Even with love, god of the heart, god of
Paris and of Dido, we all forget
how easy it was to scribble on paper
with boxes marked Yes or No.

Acclimate

September 14th, 2009

Acclimate

The first ride is blinding.
Every surface from bay to beach
to boardwalk seems coated in silver
so the sun, first yellow then white
as on a kernel of sweet corn,
has no other home but the eyes.
The windows can’t be made
of anything but quartz,
so tolerant they are of light.
This must be the opposite of blindness;
not seeing but only seeing white.
One might be lucky to find
a herd of clouds or a pause
in the naked framework of the bridge
where enough support beams converge
to give shade, though crisscrossed
like the arms of neighboring pines.

Only on the second ride,
not the return trip but the tomorrow
or the next week ride,
can one spot the details.
The bay is quilted in waves,
patterned as a bolt of hounds-tooth.
The seats, once slippery from gloss,
are scratched with the epics
and artwork of vagrants.
In the east, there are buildings
of course dwarfed by perspective
but only half hidden in the blare
of their own window-shine.
The repeat commuter can pick out
the grit of the walls, the smudges
on the glass. The wood
in the pier has rotted to wool.

When the act of the sun
setting perfectly between 2 columns
of the opposite bridge in the distance
is no longer a miracle of luck or labor,
there is still the airport to watch.
A departing plane makes such an angle
with the earth that it seems a trout,
25 tons and silver banded,
hooked by the nose and yanked.
If passengers could step outside
the cabin and see the gravity of their flight
they would feel fools for paying for tickets.

The high school student, named Terrail,
rides the train but only from the south end
to the north end of the island.
Below him, his barrio is dressed
in chip bags and soda cans.
If he listens to fast loud music,
empty of silence and pregnant with power chords,
it is only to whitewash the gunshots.
When he’ll commute across the bay
for college, he’ll learn the beauty
of the little and the large things
around him.