Archive for January, 2010

The Chopstick Paradigm

January 30th, 2010

The Chopstick Paradigm

We channeled dancers in our dialogue.
We developed a playbill of token talk,
a flow chart keying what we heard
to what we knew. Our antonymic
views grew a sustained ecology on the tips
of our tongues: the gatheredness
of a veteran of fatherhood wars
with the smelting heat of youth.
Then like ant marches we spiraled apart
and lost our secret shorthand
how we lost Phoenician that once
was on that market place stone
that once was whole and unfractioned.
Worse, his mind is addered with age;
he often forgets the Chinese word
for things. So we talk
how dancers talk: none at all
or only into each other’s shoulders.

Vita Nuova

January 25th, 2010

Vita Nuova
–Oscar Wilde

I stood by the unvintageable sea
Till the wet waves drenched face and hair with spray;
The long red fires of the dying day
Burned in the west; the wind piped drearily;
And to the land the clamorous gulls did flee:
‘Alas!’ I cried, ‘my life is full of pain,
And who can garner fruit or golden grain
From these waste fields which travail ceaselessly!’
My nets gaped wide with many a break and flaw,
Nathless I threw them as my final cast
Into the sea, and waited for the end.
When lo! a sudden glory! and I saw
From the black waters of my tortured past
The argent splendour of white limbs ascend!

I am

January 21st, 2010

I am not a monster. I am intelligent, attractive, athletic, ambitious, sincere, well spoken, accomplished, good with children, cats, and dogs, charismatic, attentive, devoted, compassionate, inspiring, empathetic, sexy, and a damn good teacher. I am attending a graduate program in a nationally top ranked college and I have my own Tae Kwon Do team.

you are really stupid. especially since I had to do all the hard work to win back your trust and all you had to do was give me a chance.

that being said, I make mistakes. I am imperfect. sometimes, I am less than human. sometimes I am a monster.

The Youngest of the Graeae

January 19th, 2010

The Youngest of the Graeae
–Agha Shahid Ali

Listen to my account as the world vanishes:
we were young, my sisters and I,
though withered from birth, our hair gray,
in this land of wavering light,
everything shrouded, the sun banished, the moon in exile.

We had the shapes of swans but we had arms,
under our wings of watered silk
our hands ready to take over
the twilight each time one finished
her ration of sight.

It now is mine, this twilight all mine:
my sisters are dead, and I alone am left
to see these trees, these forests, this ebony ocean.

There were times I would have run away
but Sisters, your dreamless faces stopped me,
the blue smoke rising from your sockets.

And what would have been out there in the world?
Only cages and torturing hands,
someone stitching our eye as a trophy
to a screen speckled with mirrors.

sisters, when I lie
as we did, with my body in the ocean,
my hair thrown like gray waves upon the sand,
I remember what we betrayed
for this twilight.

And I weep on the necks of trees,
praying,

O God of Light,
before I end this life,
lower your hands into the east
and bring up the sun, once.

growing up

January 19th, 2010

edit: I lost something great.

punctual as the stars

January 8th, 2010

the most influential poet in my life, especially in my formative years, is Agha Shahid Ali. I was lucky enough to encounter him early, as little as 2 or 3 months after I started. he is responsible for my tone and texture as well as my love of forms and reverent attitude toward other poets.

a few years ago, I was pleasently surprised to find Ali quoting James Merrill in a poem. Merrill is also another poet that I modeled myself after. it was like God (or fate or the Holy Spirit etc etc) had conspired to give me this brotherhood of mentors, coalesced before my birth and coming to me discretely yet in coordination.

I was very surprised to come across the metaphor “punctual as stars” when reading Ali the other day. a scant month before, I had written those same exact words (I lie; I had written “punctual as /the/ stars”) while describing a chessboard and how its armies are always reset at the start of a match (Ali was describing something else). to find these words, from a hero of mine, replicated was revelating. I felt touched by the godhead through ink and paper. it may have been a coincidence, a mere play of statistics, but I haven’t come across those words before. it is a sign that perhaps poetry was a good decision and that, perhaps (perhaps!), I’m coming into my own in poetry.

nobody

January 3rd, 2010

“In the United States there is more space where nobody is than where anybody is. This is what makes America what it is.”

–Gertrude Stein